11 Divas/Digital Strategies?

Happy Monday. Sitting in my new wonderful office that's streamline, beautiful, natural light, high tech, having undergone a technology refresh. Everything is backed up locally as well as to the cloud so I don't have the nagging feeling that, if my computer crashed, my life would be lost (I was never comfortable with how things were or weren't backed up at the office). And it's funny to think that your life would be lost without all the data you've stored on the computer, but really it's true, right? All my creative writing, every single document that was scanned and was shredded, archives of important e-mails, correspondence with loved ones -  it's all there in this one little device!

Recently, as part of the big purge, I distilled all our memorabilia down into one breadbox sized box (funny to say breadbox - when was the last time you actually saw one? - does anyone under the age of forty even know what a breadbox is?)  I bought one container for each of the girls and me and then went through cartons of stuff and decided what should be kept and tossed. My box labeled "Sarah 1956 through 2012" contains my very first doll (I DID find her after all - a Tiny Tears with a permed head that I remember washing over and over again. I was little - had to stand on a stool to reach the faucets), love letters from George (of the wine cave George - see previous post), precious letters from from the girls - stuff like that. Curiously it contains nothing from either of my husbands - there was nothing to keep - no love letters or sweet notes. One exception some limericks from my first husband Bill about my struggle to lose weight - they were humiliating - kept them to remind me why I left him. And separately, there are boxes and boxes of pictures but here's the weird thing - they all stop once cameras went digital. And since that time, I have owned lots of computers that have all been trashed along with the pictures that were stored on their hard drives. Somehow in the digital transition, I stopped taking pictures and the ones I took have been lost. Am I alone in that? Am I the only one who failed to have a good digital picture strategy? Thinking you all made the switch seamlessly. You got good digital cameras, all your pics are up on the web in Picassa or something, and when you like a picture, you send away for a hard copy and put it in an old fashioned photo album for posterity. Or are photo albums falling the way of the dinosaur? Worried about this.

So, the weekend - it was what it was. Friday, EVERY single one of my friends ended up bailing on Schaller's for totally understandable last minute reasons, so Shay and I went to the piano bar at Maggiano's and had a bit of fun. I can tell, the gang there are pretty convinced I've taken a 21 year old lover, and I'm doing nothing to disabuse them of the notion - it's hysterical. Does mean though that I don't get approached by men my own age - they think I'm taken! And my date on Saturday never materialized. Thomas, the academic who went dark on me for a month and then resurfaced - dark again - something's not right there. No third chances for that one!

Then Sunday morning breakfast with Mike - he's another fellow I'd spoken with at length who disappeared for mysterious reasons. He called me Saturday after I dropped off a "Welcome to Evanston" card and plant at his new condo (I was persisting in the friendship even though he was ignoring me). We agreed to finally meet and he came to the house. Result? Disappointing I think. And it's dumb because we really should be Evanston friends - we have so much in common. We agreed from the get go that, if the romantic spark wasn't there, we wouldn't throw the baby of friendship out with the bathwater - we would revise our expectations. I meant it - not sure he did. He's interesting, non conventional, really smart, unexpected in his opinions - he cares about stuff that counts - all of it good. And first meetings - they're tricky - we don't always shine. I remember Patrick talked incessantly on our first date, tale after tale about his derring-do adventures, so much that I kissed him just to get him to shut up. Red flags all over the place but I gave him a second chance, hoping he'd settle down. He did and conversation from that point was dialogue versus soliloquy. Anyway, I kind of feel for Mike - single for 15 years, seems like the single experience has jaded him and made him cynical. I didn't feel that he approached the meeting of someone new with awe and wonder and no expectations - instead it felt like there was a giant check list that he was marking off - one that I was failing miserably. But good for me that, when he left, I shrugged my shoulders and said, "Oh, well. He didn't like me. Someone else will!." And I really meant it!  Four years of therapy, having Patrick fall in love with me - I know I'm lovable for the right person. It's just a matter of finding him. But really Mike and I should be friends.

Last night, Carla, Alan and a friend of theirs and I went to the DuSable museum in Hyde Park to see a wonderful concert - The 11 Divas. Eleven wonderful black women each sang two songs - it was an extravaganza! So much fun! We were about the only white people there. One thing so interesting was how under-dressed we were. Carla pointed out to me how well black people dress for occasions and she's right! It mattered not the age or size of the woman - they were all fabulous and tasteful. Nothing wash and wear, gorgeous fabrics that required dry cleaning or ironing, crisp and perfect, bold matching accessories, coiffed hair, hats, glittery shoes. And the men, dapper and crisp in linen suits and white shoes - hats too. In contrast, there was me in my simple knit dress that's gone through the wash 100 times and a pair of flat sandals. I'm going to take a lesson from their book and pay more attention to my appearance - thinking I can do better than just always grab for what is comfortable.

No deep thoughts today. Just working hard on keeping the container intact. The leg is healing but I'm still limping from the fall. Diet is great - lost another .6 pounds (a little over 1/2 pound) when I went to WW on Saturday. No more martinis - been drinking diet coke when I go out which is a rare treat since I don't keep the stuff in the house (don't approve of fake sugars), and the house is shaping up. This week, even more organization. Working on house=Zen which will result in Sarah=Zen.

Challenge today is assessing your own container - are you caring for yourself on all fronts? Healthy meals, enough sleep, exercise, flossing your teeth, vitamins, no substance abuse, clutter, infrastructure (does your car need to go in for a tune up?), meaningful soul connections with dear ones, not squandering time on your electronic devices? It's Monday - maybe it's time for a mini goal. Let's pick one thing to do this week that will give you great satisfaction. It could be taking on something yucky that's been gnawing at you like filing divorce papers (friend of mine has identified that as his mini goal for the week - not so mini, right??), or it could be something really fun like going to the farmer's market and buying buckets of sour cherries and making preserves. Whatever it is, it should give you deep satisfaction. Great challenge, right? OK, Sarah will walk the walk. This week I promise myself I'll find some flowers to plant in my window boxes - even though the pickings are slim, I should be able to get some.  I'll get my watering can collection from the basement and arrange them on my deck. This spring I was too sad to beautify my surroundings - it was a statement of sorts to everyone that I was feeling barren within and without. Still sad but life has to move on and beauty around us is important.

Peace,
Sarah